I Count You

Listening attentively says, "I count you." Clearly stating what you want or feel, says, "I count myself."

Counting someone—either yourself or another person—is a means to say:

- you are important,

- I have confidence in your ability to handle situations and to recognize when help is needed,

- I trust you will follow through on promises.

On the other hand, when you discount someone (including yourself), the assumptions are the opposite: lack of faith, lack of confidence, and lack of trust.

Your counting attitude is not the same as your momentary feelings about someone or yourself. Counting is a way to say, "This person's intentions, thoughts, feelings, etc., are worth taking into account. You have value."

Stephen Goforth