Why Video Conferencing is Exhausting

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Video chats mean we need to work harder to process non-verbal cues like facial expressions, the tone and pitch of the voice, and body language; paying more attention to these consumes a lot of energy. “Our minds are together when our bodies feel we're not. That dissonance, which causes people to have conflicting feelings, is exhausting. You cannot relax into the conversation naturally,” according to Gianpiero Petriglieri.

Silence is another challenge, he adds. “Silence creates a natural rhythm in a real-life conversation. However, when it happens in a video call, you became anxious about the technology.” It also makes people uncomfortable. Even delays of 1.2 seconds made people perceive the responder as less friendly or focused.

An added factor—we are very aware of being watched. You are on stage, so there comes the social pressure and feeling like you need to perform. Being performative is nerve-wracking and more stressful. It’s also very hard for people not to look at their own face if they can see it on screen, or not to be conscious of how they behave in front of the camera.

Read more from the BBC

 

 

unduly influenced by outside suggestion

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Referees favour home teams in judgment calls, particularly those that happen at a crucial stage in a game. If a batter chooses not to swing at a baseball pitch, the pitch is more likely to be called a strike if the home team is pitching. This tendency is most extreme in close games. In soccer, referees are more likely to award penalties to the home team, hand out fewer punishments for offences to home players.

Are referees deliberately biased? The authors (of Scorecasting) think not. Instead, they blame the fact that referees, like the rest of us, tend subconsciously to rely on crowdsourcing, picking up on the mood of the crowd when making their decision.

“Anchoring” is the name economists give to people’s tendency to be unduly influenced by outside suggestion. Take away the crowd and the home bias shrinks, as it did a few years back when 21 Italian soccer matches were played without supporters following incidents of crowd violence. In these games the home bias declined by 23% on fouls called, by 26% for yellow cards and by a remarkable 70% for red cards, which remove a player from the game and have a particularly big impact on the result.

From The Referee's an Anchor in The Economist

If you go to bed angry

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If you go to sleep after a fight with someone, you may “preserve” those emotions. That’s the finding of researchers at the University of Massachusetts. Scientists showed images (some positive, some negative) to more than 100 people and checked 12 hours later to see which pictures stuck with the subjects. The response changed depending as to whether the person had slept during the 12-hour break or not. Sleeping seemed to protect the emotional response. You can read the details in The Journal of Neuroscience.

Other studies have also support the idea that sleep enhances emotional memories. If you have difficulty sleeping after an upsetting day, it could be your mind’s way of trying to avoid storing that memory. It’s a reminder of the Bible verse that reads, “Let not the sun go down upon your wrath” (Eph. 4:26).

Stephen Goforth

Who comes out on top

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To understand a company’s strategy, look at what they actually do rather than what they say they do. The same logic applies to one’s life. For example, ambitious people will reliably tell you that family, or being a mother or father, is the most important thing in their lives. Yet when pressed to choose between racing home to deal with a chaotic pre-bedtime scene and staying another hour at the office to solve a problem, they will usually keep working. It’s these small, everyday decisions that reveal if you’re following a path to being the best possible spouse and parent. If your family matters most to you, when you think about all the choices you’ve made with your time in a week, does your family come out on top?

Clay Christensen, How will you Measure your Life?

A 10-year-old girl has sent more than 1,500 art kits

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The Elevator Pitch  

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The Challenge: Create a compelling speech about your entire professional life-lasting no more than 15-second. Be able to offer it on demand and under pressure. 

The so-called “elevator pitch” requires serious practice. Regardless of the audience, irrespective of whether you are sitting, standing, or walking down a hall or talking on the phone, you should be comfortable offering it. You never know whether your next open door will take place at family gatherings, in the waiting room of the doctor’s office, or at a coffee shop.   

You’ll want to describe the impact you have had and can continue to have on a project or work environment. Make it about who you are rather than what you do. 

Don’t try to rattle off as much information as possible, like a college debater. Be thoughtful and deliberate. Show you are calm and confident. Yet still, be passionate and genuine. 

These questions that may help you discover your elevator pitch and paint a compelling self-portrait:

What do you think your value to an employer is?

What have you been proudest of in your work life? 

What do you love to do?

What makes you unique?

A word of caution: Pre-packaged, over-practiced canned pitches can come across as lacking respect for the one you are trying to win over. They are not a means to an end but is a person. Your goal isn’t just to sell yourself but start an Elevator Conversation. It's not just me; it’s about us.

Think of it this way: Most people want to hire interesting, intelligent people who they would enjoy spending time working with day-to-day—not slogan shouters.

Stephen Goforth

The Best Advice

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Talk a little less, and listen more. Less advice is often the best advice. People don’t need lots of advice; they need a listening ear and some positive reinforcement. What they want to know is often already somewhere inside of them. They just need time to think, be and breathe, and continue to explore the undirected journeys that will eventually help them find their direction.

Marc and Angel Chernoff