Playing Patty-cake

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With younger children the communication is more and more nonverbal but still ideally requires periods of total concentration.

You can't play patty-cake very well when your mind is elsewhere. And if you can only play patty-cake halfheartedly, you are running the risk of having a halfhearted child. Adolescent children require less total listening time from their parents than a six-year-old but even more true listening time.

They are much less likely to chatter aimlessly, but when they do talk, they want their parents' full attention even more than do the younger children.

M Scott Peck, The Road Less Traveled

Love's advice to his younger self

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Robert Love offers this advice to his 16-year-old self in The Week magazine:

Dear Bob: Would you like some advice from the older you? Turn the volume down to 10 and the SPF up to 30. Be patient with yourself and those who cross your path. Cherish your friends and family; you will miss them soon enough. Don’t feel too bad if you never seem to understand the girl in your life. There are mysteries that will never be solved. Most of all, never lose your curiosity. It will guide you to a career and a calling and bring you into the company of others who are wildly curious about the world and how it works. Believe me, there is no better place to be.

Looking for the ‘Right One’

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While looking for someone who will encourage you to "be yourself", go beyond self-expression and acceptance to content and growth: Look for someone who will help the process of more clearly defining yourself. That is, someone who will not only give you "space" or room to "do your own thing” but someone who spark a chemistry, a back-and-forth, a give-and-take that produces something about you that couldn't have come up with alone. It works the other way around, too. You should spur your beloved’s growth as a person. The two of you should be able to look at the seeds inside the other and visualize the fully formed tasty fruit that could emerge.

Stephen Goforth

Be your imperfectly perfect self

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In this crazy world that’s trying to make you like everyone else, find the courage to keep being your awesome self. And when they laugh at you for being different, laugh back at them for being the same. Spend more time with those who make you smile and less time with those who you feel pressured to impress. 

Marc & Angel Chernoff

Test your Online Security Setup

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Answer a few simple questions from Security.org to find out whether you are staying safe online.

Created by Security.org  • View larger version

Two Ways to Understand the World

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The psychologist Jerome Bruner has argued that human beings understand the world in two very different ways. The first he calls the “paradigmatic mode” of thought. In the paradigmatic mode, we seek to comprehend our experience in terms of tightly reasoned analyses, logical proof, and empirical observation. In the second, “narrative mode” of thought, we are concerned with human wants, needs and goals. This is the mode of stories, wherein we deal with “the vicissitudes of human intention” organized in time. 

Masters of the Heritage Matic mode try to “say no more than they mean.” Examples are scientists or logicians seeking to determine cause-and-effect relationships in order to explain events and help predict and control reality. Their explanations are constructed in such a way as to block the triggering of presuppositions.

By contrast, good poets and novelists are masters of the narrative mode. Their stories are especially effective when, in Bruner’s words, they “mean more than they can say.” A good story triggers presuppositions. Good stories give birth to many different meanings, generating “children” of meaning in their own image.

Dan McAdams, The Stories We Live By

Does money make us happier? Here's what the research says

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Money only makes you happier if you live below the poverty line and you can’t put food on your table and then you can afford to. Whether getting superrich actually affects different aspects of your well-being? There’s a lot of evidence it doesn’t affect your positive emotion too much.

There was a recent paper by Matt Killingsworth where he was trying to make the claim that happiness continues as you get to higher incomes. And yeah, he’s right, but if you plot it, it’s like if you change your income from $100,000 to $600,000 your happiness goes up from, like, a 64 out of 100 to a 65. For the amount of work you have to put in to sextuple your income, you could instead just write in a gratitude journal, you could sleep an extra hour.

Yale cognitive scientist Laurie Santos, quoted in the New York Times

A new 988 number for the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline

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A new 988 number for the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline goes into service on July 16. It will accept texts and live chat is available. Unfortunately, according to the Wall Street Journal, it relies on call centers that are already overstretched. Annual call volumes to the current 10-digit line increased by 92% from 2016 to 2021. Of more than nine million calls to the hotline from 2016 to 2021, 1.5 million were abandoned before they were answered. Read more about the new service in the Wall Street Journal, BuzzFeed News and the Associated Press.

8 Password Managers

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1Password*
This popular password manager stores them in your Web browser, allowing users to only have one master password to access them all. Makes good use of the cloud to keep it in sync with all your devices. Starts at $36. 14 day free trial option.

Bitwarden*
The free version of this open source password manager is one of the best but it bare bones so if you want more and are willing to pay you’ll find better. User experience not as intuitive as other options. $10 a year for more options though storage is limited.

Dashline
A solid password manager with VPN service. Strong interface. $60 a year.

DataVault
Password manager to protect your data. Can sync through Dropbox. $10 for any operating system.

eWallet
Password manager to protect your data. Nice look, customizable. The Windows version is $20, others $10.

KeePassXC
Open source password manager. Purposely no cloud option. All passwords are stored locally. Free.

Keeper
Password manager. Well-designed interface. Free plan is limited. Paid starts at $34.99 a year.

Lastpass
Generates and saves passwords. Strong cross-platform experience. The company has had some past security issues. Free version is limited. Paid is $36 a year.

More Tech Tools

27 articles about job interview prep

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4 tricks for getting rid of your nerves and appearing more confident in a job interview - Business Insider

38 Smart Questions to Ask in a Job Interview - Harvard Business Review

41 impressive questions to ask in a job interview - ZDnet

6 Interview Questions that will make any employer want to hire you - PR Daily

7 Things you never say in a PR agency job interview - PR Daily

8 Questions To Ask An Interviewer - GlassDoor

10 self-sabotaging interview mistakes to avoid  - The Week

Avoid these 9 mistakes when answering interview questions - Fast Company

How to Answer Anecdotal Interview Questions - LifeHacker

How to Answer ‘Tell Me About Yourself’ - Undercover Recruiter

How to answer the 5 most essential interview questions - USA Today

How To Recognize Red Flags At A Job Interview - Digg

How to speak body language during an interview - PR Daily

How to Succeed in a Virtual Interview - Indeed

Interview Questions to Ask Your Interviewer - Dave Ceddia

It Pays to Ask Smart Questions at a Job Interview - Wall Street Journal ($)

How to Succeed in Your Next Job Interview - Harvard Business Review (video)

Interview Killers - Wall Street Journal ($)

Job Applicant's Social Fit can Trump Qualifications - Bloomberg

Learn What an Unstructured Interview Is and How to Prepare - Glass Door

Rookie Mistakes on Your First Job Interview - Ivan Dimitrijevic

Should you Admit Why You Were Fired? - Fortune

Talking Too Much - Wall Street Journal ($)

There's a Right Answer to What's Your Greatest Weakness in a Job Interview - Inc

What should you do if asked about your salary history in a job interview?  - Washington Post

What to Say When You Don't Have an answer to an Interview Question - LifeHacker  

Your ultimate guide to ace the most common interview questions - Fast Company

More Job Tips

The Key to happiness in our later years

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Each of us has something like a “Happiness 401(k)” that we invest in when we are young, and that we get to enjoy when we are old. And just as financial planners advise their clients to engage in specific behaviors—make your saving automatic; think twice before buying that boat—we can all teach ourselves to do some very specific things at any age to make our last decades much, much happier.

According to a Harvard study, the single most important trait of happy-well elders is healthy relationships. As Robert Waldinger, who directs the study, told me in an email, “Well-being can be built—and the best building blocks are good, warm relationships.” 

Arthur C. Brooks, writing in The Atlantic